


Will You Love Me Again

by 11_1Young_writer



Category: Haikyuu!!, ハイパープロジェクション演劇「ハイキュー!!」| Hyper Projection Play "Haikyuu!!" RPF
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Crying, Hanahaki Disease, I'm Sorry, Kuroo Tetsurou Being an Asshole, Light Angst, M/M, Married Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei, Mentioned Kozume Kenma, Other, Possessive Akaashi Keiji, Sad Tsukishima Kei, Wedding Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 19:26:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29938236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/11_1Young_writer/pseuds/11_1Young_writer
Summary: "I'm sorry for ruined your life...i shouldn't exist in your life..once again I'm sorry,"."oh great you notice that... So you know what will happen after this..you know what you should do," a smirk from the man.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei
Comments: 3
Kudos: 41





	1. He's The One

**Author's Note:**

> Hello🙈this is my very first krtsk fanfic. I post on Wattpad before tho🙂and this is a warning.....
> 
> English is not my first language so it may have grammartical errors, typos. So if you spotted any of it pls tell me so I can learn and fix it.😩

Tsukishima POV

This day....  
It's finally came. The day I'll be marry with the only one I love. After years crushing on him, finally.....

****

" Tsukki!!! Faster!! He's waiting!" Yamaguchi shouted calling Tsukishima to hurry.  
"yeah, I'm coming!" he replied and walking faster towards his friend. When he arrived, they walked towards the hall to meet his future husband. His hand was shaking at that time. Nervous? Yes. But at the same time he feels really happy that didn't believe that this will come.

" Tsukki, you're shaking..are you nervous?" yamaguchi asked him when he realised that his friend was shaking..he chuckles a bit.  
" kinda..." he replied shortly. In their way.... They met Yachi with a short sky blue dress. " hey! You two! Hurry..." the girl said dragging Tsukishima and Yamaguchi to walk faster. Yamaguchi was blushed and Tsukishima giggled looking at his friend. As they arrived, all peoples was already there waiting for him. Yamaguchi walked him towards his future husband who has a big smile on his face.

" you look gorgeous, Tsukki. Or should I call Kei," said the man teased him with a small smirk.  
" shut up!" he replied annoyingly and smile came up on his smile. He's staring at his future husband's face. Kuroo Tetsuro, the man that he will marry after this. Standing with him, teasing him with a smirk. 'Thank you God..for giving me a chance to be love by him' he thought.

*****

The wedding was held perfectly. And now, his named was Tsukishima kei anymore...its Kuroo kei..

" congratulations Tsukishima!!" an orange boy congrats him. Followed by the others. 

"HEY! HEY! HEY!! CONGRATS KUBRO!!" Bokuto Koutarou, an owl congrats to Kuroo. " shut it out, koutarou. You're to loud," the other man besides him mad at bokuto for being to loud. It Akaashi Keiji, bokuto's boyfriend. " ahah, thank you bokubro," kuroo replied while chuckled at bokuto being scolded by his boyfriend. " Where's Kenma? He didn't come at my wedding? I'm his best friend tho," kuroo said disappointed. " he's busy so he couldn't come.." Akaashi answered him. 

They enjoyed the day celebrating their special day... 

****

Few weeks later

Tsukishima POV

After weeks, we live happily together in our new house that we buy before married. Today was a beautiful day...enjoying our morning together but its just for a moment....when something happen... 

A letter posted to us as we read it, it say.... 

To, Kuroo and Tsukishima, 

If you have this letter so that's mean I'm gone. Kuroo, I'm sorry that I didn't tell you about this but I didn't want to ruin your relationship with Tsukishima-san. You love him so much that I didn't have the chance. I just want to say that I love you. I love you so much that I can't stop thinking about you. Since we're in high school, I already fall for you but I don't have the strength to confess so I just keep it. Have you heard about the hanahaki disease? I know you'll not believe it but... There's flower in my lungs. It's made me hard to breathe. I'm holding this since 10 months ago but I don't want to tell you. It's for your own sake. Please don't blame yourself for my death. And take a good care of Tsukishima-san. Promise me that. Make him happy. And to Tsukishima-san, take care of Kuroo. You can give him something that I can't give. You're the only who can make him happy. Once again, I'm sorry for keep it secret. Kuroo, I love you. Bye.. 

Your friend  
Kozume kenma


	2. Pretend

"Kenma... Why don't you tell me that you have a feeling for me..why don't you be honest and tell me earlier so that I can help you. You know what..i love you Kenma. I'm always love. So don't leave me..from the very start we met, you're the only one in my heart. I've never told you because I taught you loves chibi-chan. I was scared tajt you'll reject me. Kenma please come back. I beg you. I'll never let you suffer anymore. I will always loves you kenma. There no one I love besides you, " Kuroo crying loudly begging kenma to come back. Bokuto and Akaashi who was there beside him shocked after heard what kuroo said.

" o..oi..what do you mean by there's no one you love besides kenma? What about Tsukki. He's your husband you know. You're just married weeks ago.." Bokuto ask didn't believe with what kuroo said.

" can't you hear me! Kenma is the only one I love. I love him with all my heart. I've married Kei because I want to forgot about my feelings towards Kenma but I've never knew that it will end up like this. I've never knew that Kenma loves me too," Kuroo replied while crying hardly. Same expression from Bokuto and Akaashi..shocked. Can't believe that Kuroo never loves their moon friend. At that time Bokuto was about to hit Kuroo but...

SLAPP!!!

" how could you do that to Tsukishima. He loves you very much that he do everything for you and this is what you give him. Why did he even met someone stupid. How can he fall for someone who didn't know how to appreciate him. What if he heard all this..what if he hurt...ill never forgive if something happen to him, " Akaashi slapped Kuroo angrily. Kuroo shocked...didn't believe that the cool Akaashi who was always calm will be mad.. He then dragged Bokuto with him leaving kuroo speechless alone...

***

Tsukishima was at their house prepared dinner for his husband. He didn't came at Kenma's funeral because Kuroo didn't allowed him. At first he forced to go but kuroo said that he will end up hurt so he just listened to his husband even he's confused with what his husband said.

A few minutes later, there's sound in the living room so that's mean Kuroo was home. When he tried to get Kuroo, his husband just ignored him at walked towards the guest room. Tsukishima was kinda confused but he slowly walked and knocked the door but he only got shouted by Kuroo...

" LEAVE ME ALONE!! I NEED SPACE!!" Tsukishima was speechless with what had happened and then he walked leaving Kuroo to give him some space. He clean the kitchen and and the food that he already cook..'maybe he'll eat it tomorrow' he taught. After he finished, he walked to his room with a sad face..

He know what happened...  
He know why Kuroo is acting like that..  
He know everything..

Flashback

Tsukishima drove his car to visit Kenma's funeral because Akaashi ask him to. Akaashi said that he needs to at least visit because Kenma was their friend. When he arrived and about to come in, he heard a familiar voice crying loudly...it was Kuroo..

Crack! '/! *? *!! *:#%? @

His eyes widened..cant believe with what he has heard...

' Tetsurou....loves....k..Kenma??? Eh?? ' it feel like his heart was about to fall... 'h..he..didn't..lo..love..m..me...huh?? Ha..ha..' Tsukishima smile a little..yes it was fake.. He heard everything.. From the very started until the moment Akaashi slapped his husband's face.  
' is that's so...' tears slowly fall on his cheeks...

When he heard footsteps...he walked faster to get his car, leaving the place without anyone know that he was there... He didn't want anyone to know that he heard everything..he didn't want his friends to worry about him. When he got his cars, his phone ringing... It was Akaashi...he answered the call and talked like there's nothing happened...

" Tsukishima-san, where are you," Akaashi started the conversation..  
" owh I'm at my house, why..do you need anything??" he lied...he didn't want to heve secrets between them but he can't help from lying at that time..  
" it's nothing..i just ask. Ermm do you planned to come at Kenma's funeral?" Akaashi asked..  
" No I don't. I'm sorry but I have something to do..so..I can't," he lied again..he know that Akaashi will ask that question so it surprise him.  
" owh ok then, I just want to ask that actually..bye," they ended the call..

***

It's hurt..really hurt...he tried to deny that what Kuroo have said was just a lie..he believed that Kuroo talked without thinking but still...he can't help from crying hardly...he can't stop...

When he arrived at their house, he cried...loudly but no one heard him...no one knows what he feel at that time..after hours and he made his decision...he will never told anyone about it..he just need to pretended that he didn't heard anything..pretended that he didn't go anywhere but stayed at home hearing some classical music...pretended that he's fine...

' I'm fine....'


	3. What Can I Do

' I'm fine' 

From that day, Kuroo always visit Kenma's grave and its being Kuroo's routine. Everyday, he will come home late in drunk condition and he will crying hardly. Seeing his husband like that made Tsukishima worry but at the same time, his heart slowly broke into pieces..

'it's hurt..i know he loves Kenma from the very beginning but why did I still accepted him? Why did I need to face all this? Only if I didn't met him before. Only if we've never talked. Only if I don't fall in love with him. They must be living in a happy life..' 

he smile while tears slowly fall on his cheek.

' it's my fault. Right? '

It's hurt. It's hurt him so much. He don't even have the chance to talk with Kuroo. Everytime he tried to talk to him, he only get shout or being ignore like he never exist in Kuroo's life.

He keep thinking that he is a bad guy who stole people's happiness. He don't deserve loves from anyone. He's a failure..he can't even make his husband happy. What type of husband he is. He's a burden to Kuroo. To his friend. To his family. To everyone. He's a burden.

"what can I do to make sure you'll happy?? I'm sorry 'cause I'm not a good husband. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry", he mumbled while crying in his room.

***

" Tetsurou, err...breakfast is ready. So..err...you need to eat. I've cooked a mushroom soup for you. So open the door," Tsukishima called his husband for breakfast.

" just eat first. I'll eat after you," Kuroo answered him. Tsukishima feel like his heart wanted to break again. Kuroo don't even want to face him. He don't even want to see his face.

" err...dont worry..I'm gonna leave by now. I'll visit Akaashi today so you can eat now. All the foods are in the kitchen. I'm sorry for bothering you. I'm leaving now. See..yah.." footsteps heard leaving the room. Tsukishima grabbed his car's key and leave their apartment walking towards his car. Once he arrived he drove his car to meet Akaashi.

***

Kuroo walked out of his room and go to the kitchen. He looked at the food that his husband cooked for him. He take it and throw it away. "why should I eat his food. I can buy it myself," he then opened the fridge and take a beer and drink it.

He take shower and dress up. Ready to go to his workplace.

He hates his husband. He hate the fact that he already married. He hate the fact that the love of his life already dead. And it's all because of him. He hates the fact that he didn't have the chance to confess to his crush that have the same feeling as him. He hates himself.

***

" ah...Tsukishima, come in. Kou was already go to work so it's only the two of us," Akaashi greeted his friend and let him in. Tsukishima only nod and walked in. He puts his bag on the floor and sat on the couch while Akaashi walked to the kitchen and after a while he come with waters on his hand." so..how was your life with Kuroo? Everything fine?" Akaashi asked him. Tsukishima just gave him a fake smile and say "yeah. We're doing fine, " he lied. Akaashi just nodded because he knows that his friend was lying but never ask for it. He didn't want to make his friend more stress. They continue with discuss about their work since they work in the same place. They were both work as a doctor. But that day was their off day. The discussion continued until afternoon. At that time, Bokuto come home for lunch with his love Akaashi.

" HEY! HEY! HEY!!! TSUKKI!! long time no see. How is Kuroo?" Bokuto yell as he walked to the kitchen and hugged Akaashi. Tsukishima just gave him a weak smile. " Bokuto, we've met yesterday right? And yeah Kuroo is...fine? Yeah he's fine," Tsukishima answers him with a small chuckle." are you okay?? You look weak. Are you sick??" Bokuto asked with a worried tone. "y-yeah I'm fine. Don't worry. I just..a little bit tired lately. It's because I worked until late night. Don't worry," he say as he walked to the bathroom. His head feel dizzy. Everything looked blurred even he's wearing his glasses. Suddenly he feel like he want to cough..then he ran to the bathroom faster...he cough hardly..and he washed his face. 'not here' he taught. As he walked out the bathroom, his head started to feel dizzy again. He can't see well. And suddenly....

THUDD!!!!

Akaashi and Bokuto who heard the sound ran towards it. Their eyes widened as they saw Tsukishima is lying on the floor.


	4. Don't Make Him.....

THUDD!!

Bokuto and Akaashi shocked when they saw Tsukishima lying on the floor. They hurriedly get him to the hospital. After a few minutes the arrived and rush him to the doctor. Akaashi in other hand can't stop moving worried about his friend. Just a while ago they saw Tsukishima weak face but they didn't do anything and now he was in the hospital. Bokuto felt the same but trying to keep calm. He know his friend will be okay.

" Koutarou..."- Akaashi.

"hmmm..." Bokuto hummed as an answer. Akaashi look at him. Bokuto can see the worried face on him. He smile patting his head. Akaashi started to talk again..

" do you think--there's something happened between Tsukishima and Kuroo? I mean..Tsukishima never talked about his life with Kuroo and everytime I ask about it he will change the topic and sometimes he just ignoring it. He looks busy lately and he didn't wanna go home. He say there's nothing important he can do at home and that's why he keep busy. I don't know but..is it because what he said at Kenma's funeral?, " Akaashi sounds really worried. Yeah..it is. Tsukishima never mentioned his problem with anyone. No one know about his life with Kuroo. He keep busy with his work. (he made himself busy). He didnt wanna go home because he knows..no one will wait for him. Nothing special in his house. Even his husband didn't wanna talked to him. Its just like he's living alone in that house. He'll do everything to avoid him thinking about his problem with Kuroo. Even though he's hurt but he's not weak. He didn't want people to think he's weak. So he must forget about everything. His personality changed when he's out of his house. He just keep himself calm like nothing happened.

" I-I don't know. Everytime is with me he'll acted normal like his old self. But same as Tsukishima. They never mentioned each other. If I ask him how Tsukishima is..he will answer that Tsukishima always with you so he told me to just ask you. I bet there's really something but I don't know what. I- feel like...i don't know.." Bokuto looks frustrated thinking about his bro. 

" I will never forgive him if something happen to Tsukishima, " Akaashi greet his teeth. They remained silence after that and suddenly the Tsukishima's rooms door opened as revealed a sweet doctor. Akaashi get up and walked towards the doctor. 

" Ennoshita-san. How is him? Is he okay. Something happened to him?, " Akaashi can't stop worrying about him. 

"he..Tsukishima is..yeah. He's okay. He just tired due to overworked. He just need more rest. I can see him work more hard lately. But dont..err..dont worry. He'll be..err..fine," Ennoshita, Tsukishima's senior when he was in high school, gave him a weak smile. 

" it's good to hear it. He looks pale lately. I'm worried about him. Thank you, " Akaashi said in relief. Ennoshita smiled at him." yeah. You're welcome. If you'll excuse me I need to go now," Ennoshita bowed to him and Akaashi just nodded. After that Ennoshita walked but after a few steps he turned back and say.." tell Kuroo-san to take a good care of him. Make sure he give him enough love. Dont make him suffer more. Not get me wrong but...I just worried about my junior. Kay.." with that he continued to walked leaving Akaashi an Bokuto on the corridor. 

Akaashi and Bokuto then walked to meet Tsukishima in his room. When they was about to enter the room,the heard Tsukishima hummed singing. They smiled and walked in." Tsukki...hey...you just humming but its sound really good. Sing for me..." Bokuto entered the room and hugged him tightly. " Koutarou stop it. You'll kill him just by hug. And don't ask him to sing if don't want to," Akaashi who followed being him hug Tsukishima gently. Tsukishima just smile." nah..its okay. Tank you. And don't worry Bokuto-san. I'll come to your house next week and I'll sing for you Kay? " Tsukishima chuckled when he saw Bokuto's eyes sparkled." Yeayyy!!! That's our Tsukki!!" "Koutarou! Tsukishima isn't ours. He belong to Kuroo," Akaashi look at Tsukishima and he saw Tsukishima expression changed. His smile faded few seconds and smiled again. At this point,he knew it. Something wrongs. "yeah..i..belong to him," Tsukishima continued his smile. Wider that before. But its that really a true smile? Without pain? Heh..'yeahh..i belongs to him. But it's okay. As long as I have this two and the others..I'll always fine. At least they're worried about me. But I'm sorry guys. I can't tell you the truth. Thanks to Ennoshita for not telling them the truth.' 

***

They leave the hospital and sent him to his house. " Tsukki..do wanna stop somewhere or just straight to your house?" Bokuto asked him. "oh it's okay. Just keep going. I don't need anything. Thank you for asking," he smile a little. And then they keep straight to his house once they arrived, Tsukishima thanked them but Akaashi said he want to meet Kuroo. Tsukishima invited them in but they wanted to talk to him personally so he walked in calling h it s husband. 

" uh..Tetsurou?? Are you there?" he knocked Kuroo's room's door.   
" what do you want this time?" he answered.   
"uh..uhm..Bokuto and Akaashi is outside. They want to talk to you. And don't worry. I'm not with you when they talk to you. They're waiting," he then left the room and go to Akaashi told them that Kuroo will talk to them. After a few minutes Kuroo out of his room and moved his leg towards his bro. Once he arrived, he saw his husband talked to Akaashi with a smile. Tsukishima saw him and excused himself to the kitchen. " make sure you eat properly and take enough rest. And Ennoshita said you can take a day off tomorrow. Sooo rest well okay. And..dont force yourself to do something stupid. You need to smile more. The light wge you smile keep fading ," Akaashi said and kissed his forehead. Tsukishima just smile a little an nodded. Bokuto too..he hugged him and do the same as Akaashi. He gave him a forehead kiss. Meanwhile Kuroo just looked at them. It's like he didn't exist there. Being ignored. After a while Tsukishima the leave them alone. 

"sooo..what..do we talk about, actually??" Kuroo started the conversation. The two of them then looked at him. " Bro..can I ask you something?" - Bokuto. "ahh...sure. What?" kuroo furrowed his eyebrow. "is there something happened between you and Tsukishima??" Akaashi asked him directly and Bokuto nodded in agreement. Kuroo just keep himself silent a few seconds before he answered them. "no..theres nothing happened. We live happy here. Why? Did he say something?" Kuroo answered calmly. Ohhh how good is his skill acting like nothings happened. Happy? Did they really live happy? Maybe for him. Maybe he felt happy seeing his husband suffered everyday. 

" nahh..he didn't say anything. He just looks so tired so thought you're having a fight. That's why we're worried about him. Ha faint at our house but we bring him to the hospital," Bokuto answered him. Kuroo was shocked hearing that Tsukishima faint. He never expected that Tsukishima will get sick since he's a doctor." so..is he okay? Something happened to him? It's nothing right? " Kuroo asked him worriedly. he don't know why but knowing that Tsukishima faint made him worried. " Ennoshita said he's okay. He just need some rest because he's doing to much worked. The hospital is busy right now so we will be busy but he looks like he working on something that we didn't know. He keep working and he keep forgot to eat. I can see how he worked lately. He looks tired. Did he get enough sleep. He looks pale?" Akaashi answered with a worried face. The question 'did he get enough sleep?' how can he know. He never pud attention on him." I..dont know. I sleep...earlier than him. So I don't know?," with a small voice he said it. Akaashi look unimpressed with the answer but he didnt want to ask. "hmm..is that so? Okay then but make sure he take enough rest. Ennoshita asked me to tell you to take good care of him. He want you to give him more love and don't make him soffer more. I don't know why said this but there's something that they didn't told us. There's a secret that they keep from us. So take a good care of him. He's your husband after all. We need to go now. Remember what I say, " with that Akaashi and Bokuto leave their friend house. Kuroo still standing there trying to understand what Akaashi told him. He keep questioning what Ennoshita mean by 'don't make him suffer more' what was that?? Did he know about our relationship? Did Tsukishima told him?

He walked in ans saw Tsukishima was in living room holding a book whike talking to someone in his phone. He can see how weak his husband looks. He heard his husband conversation.. 

"ahh don't worry Ennoshita-san. I'll be okay. I'm in my house. Just...thanks for helping me about it. - - - - ah about that.. I think I'm not gonna do it. Maybe one day if I really need to but I bet I'm okay to not doing it. - - - - I..heh..i don't care I think. Its not like it's possible for me to have it. - - - it's okay. I'll be fine. I'll meet them later. I've planned to meet them. It's been a long time tho..- - - - oh ahh he's..here-" he stop talking when he saw Kuroo stared at him. He then stand up and put his book on the table. He bowed to Kuroo and leave the living room to his room. Kuroo wanted to talk to him but he didn't have the chance because Tsukishima already leave him to his room. Seeing his husband leave him like that make his heart hurt. But he didn't know why. It's not like he love him. He don't love him...right?


	5. I Like You So Much, We Lost it

"KEIJIII!!!" a shout from Bokuto once he step out from the bathroom. He frowned when he didn't saw Akaashi in their bedroom. "HEY! BABE! WHERE ARE YOU?! DON'T LEAVE MEEE!" Bokuto let out a little sob trying get his lover attention. " oh god. Spare me for having a boyfriend like this. For fuck sake Koutarou, I'm busy preparing for dinner. Come here," Akaashi let out a sigh didn't know what to do with his lover. Bokuto then walked with a wide smile to the kitchen and hugged Akaashi from the back kissing his neck." I thought you leave me..." he keep doing kiss his lover neck." hey stop it. Why would I leave you? Go take a sit. It's dinner time and I'll never leave you okay?" Akaashi pushed his lover to his sit and put the plate on the table and take his sit as well. It's only a simple dinner since he didn't eat much. They started eat and Bokuto started a conversation....

"sooo...you know...about Kuroo and Tsukki..I think there's really something happened between them. Don't you think?" Akaashi looked up from his food to face Bokuto. Yeah...he can see that something wrong between them. It's really obvious. With what happen at their apartment yesterday. They don't talk and Tsukishima keep avoiding his gaze from meeting Kuroo's. And the way Kuroo talked when they ask about Tsukishima. He's nervous. "well, I saw it too but I dont know how I can make Tsukishima to tell me. He keep avoiding it. Like, he won't tell us. He hide something from us. I know it but I don't know what it is." Bokuto just hummed in agreement. They remained silence again.

" do you have a plan next weekend?" Bokuto asked Akaashi.  
" nope. I think I'm gonna stay here. Why? Do you have a plan or something? " Akaashi being curious. Bokuto take a deep breathe before started talking.  
" what if...we help Tsukki and Kuroo. I can't bear seeing them like that. I want them to live happily ever after," Bokuto pouted. Akaashi looked confused but yeah...he want to do the same.  
" how?? "

***

Tsukishima got off day due with what happened yesterday and so do Kuroo. It's his off day. Now, they're both in their own room. 

Tsukishima already finish reading his novel and didn't know what to do so he decided to watch some show in the living room. It's not like Kuroo will come out from his room. Actually he really hope that Kuroo will come out. He wanted to discuss something. He wanted to figure out the answer from his husband. 

Once he's out, he walked to the kitchen to grab a bowl with strawberries in it and then go to the living room sitting on the couch. 

He watched a love story movie with a title 'Irreplaceable You' it's a story about Abbie (played by Gugu Mbatha-Raw) is diagnosed with terminal cancer (yes, the tissues will be coming out early in this one) and tries to find someone to love and care for the fiancé she's leaving behind. Trying to find the love of her life's next partner because she don't have long to live. It's a sad movie so he prepared a box of tissues beside him. He enjoyed the movie while eating his strawberries. And the more he watched the more tears fall on his cheek. Sometimes he laughed thinking why he cried. Like it's related to his life. Well...even it's sad, he keep it until the end of the movie. Once the movie end, he turned off the TV and finished his strawberries. He loves strawberry so much. He remember that day when Kuroo brought him to strawberry farm. The pick a lot of strawberries. That time, Kuroo laughed a lot. They kissed, cuddled a lot and they do many things together. But...that's in the past. Now...its impossible to laugh like that again.

When he busy remembering all his memories with Kuroo, his husband came out from his room. Walked towards the kitchen searching for beer. Tsukishima look at him as he trying to came back to his room but suddenly Tsukishima called him. 

" Tetsurou..." he called. Kuroo stopped on his track and turn around to see Tsukishima. He just hummed in answer. Tsukishima didn't look at him, he stared at the ceiling with strawberry on his hand. 

"someday...someday, will you cry if I die?" his eyes still looking at the ceiling. He didn't want to know Kuroo expression. 

Kuroo didn't know what to say. He asking himself..why did he ask something like that? He confused. He didn't answer Tsukishima question. Silence....Tsukishima let out a small laugh before he talked again. 

"ah...sorry, sorry. My bad. Let make it a little bit easy. Do you happy living with me?" he smiled. A weak smile. Still..he remain silence from Kuroo. He let out a big sigh...he know Kuroo never happy living with him. But...he want to hear it from Kuroo's mouth. His mouth that always smirked at him. That made him fall in love with him. 

" it's that really hard to answer my question? Or...can't you talk? Just answer me. I won't bite.." Kuroo didn't know what to say. Did he happy living with him. He didn't know.

Silence.... 

"uhmm...last question. If you didn't answer this that's mean no from you," he take a deep breathe before continue.."do you love me?" he looked away from the ceiling at looked at Kuroo. 

Kuroo was shocked with the question. He want to answer him hes still questioning himself if he really loves Tsukishima. Did he really loves his husband. He didn't know what he's feeling right now. He just bit his lower lips. Didn't know how to answer. 

Tsukishima was waiting for answer from Kuroo but still..its silence. He looked back at the ceiling closed his eyes. " it's silence. That's mean no isn't it. Haha...don't worry. I'm waiting for answer but I bet you can't talked anymore huh. Maybe you'll only talk to people you love. I'm not the one you love..hahh at least now I know. I don't need to worry anymore," it's tears. Tears falling on his cheek. Kuroo saw his tears and he feel guilty. He want to go towards Tsukishima but his body stopped him. He just stand there looking at his crying husband." you don't need to worry about me. I just..just..im sorry. All of this...it will end one day and you'll live happy ever after without me. Just a little bit more. Fuhhh..." he wiped his tears before talking again. "if you want to eat anything I'll just leave it on the table after kay? I want to meet someone after this. But I bet you don't ven care at all. Just go to your room already. You don't need to face me if you hate me," he smile at Kuroo and excuse himself to his room. 

Kuroo stayed there trying to understand what Tsukishima just say. If he hate Tsukishima then why did he feel guilty with what just happened? Why??....

***

A week past after the conversation. Its hurt him so much but he cat force Kuroo to love him back. 'bet I'll die soon huh..' this thought keep playing in his head. He shook his head trying to forgot about what happened. 

Today he'll come over to Akaashi and his lover's house. He promise to sing them a song so here he is. In front of their apartment. He knock the door and in about three times, the door opened and reveal Akaashi with his soft smile. Akaashi let him come in and he just straight yo the couch with Bokuto there. 

"heyyy, Tsukki. Do you feel well?" Bokuto asked him. Worried if the same thing happened again. He just smile and answered that he's okay. 

"soooo....today, you'll sing right? You promise me before," Bokuto asked excitedly while Akaashi sitting beside him.   
"yeah I'll sing for you~" he say and chuckled a bit. Akaashi just watched him and smile. "what song would you like to sing?" asked Akaashi. He's thinking a while to decide what song he will sing. Once he got a idea he smile softly. "err..i just heard this song before and I loves this song so much. So hear me out.." he took the guitar that Bokuto prepared for him. When he wanted to started, Bokuto asked if he can record him singing and he nodded. 

He take a deep breathe and started to strummed the guitar, while singing. 

\---

I like your eyes, you looked away when you pretended to care

I like the dimples on the corners of the smile that you wear

You wore them more with her, I knew and I was scared

I let myself fall deeper but I was prepared

I liked your shirt, the one I gave you can't forget how you smell

But now on different shoulders hang the jacket I used to wear

I loved you for so long, sometimes it's hard to bear

But after all this time I wish you well from here

I loved you every minute, every second

Loved you everywhere and any moment

Always and forever was just for a moment

'cause I was not the one, I don't know how

I loved you 'til the last of snow disappeared

Missed you on the rainy days of the year

Never knew of pain like this but I've got to know

\---

Pain...yeah..he never expected all this thing will happen. Because they're happy before. Full of love, laugh and everything. He never thought about their relationship to be a sad ending. Because he's wishing for a happy ending.

\---

Thought I loved you so

Why did you go?

\---

Ahhh...no matter how he tried to forget their conversation, they still come back. And it's hurt him. So much. 

\---

I hate the way you let us go like it was all just nothing

I hate the way you hit the notes, but not the words I'm saying

I hate the little things like when I'm unaware

I still remember how we broke so perfectly

\---

His tears started to fall. And he close his eyes. He didn't want the duo in his front to worried about him. 

\---

Though sometimes when life brings me down

Time can heal my heart

Through the bad rainy days

I know that I will be okay

\---

He can't bear his tears anymore and it's keep falling hardly. The two started to worry and when he opened his eyes, he can see Bokuto almost cry. So he smiled. 

\---

I loved you every minute, every second

Loved you even if it was for a moment

Always and forever can wait for the time because

You were not the one, I know that now

\---

He remember everything from the very beginning. Their first date that they go to the mall and buy some dinasour plushies. They're happy that time. 

\---

In a world still full of life I see color

In a bit of time 'cause we deserve better

Always and forever when the right one comes because

Part of loving you is letting go

\---

'hey Tetsu..I'll always love no matter what happen. So don't leave me?' 

'I won't, Moonshine. I'll never leave you. I love you' 

LIAR!! 

\---

Part of loving you.... 

was letting go

\---

'hey Tetsu..I'll always love no matter what happen. So don't leave me?' 

'I won't, Moonshine. I'll never leave you. I love you' 

His voice cracked at the end of the song. He's crying. Once it's end the duo hugged him tightly while rubbing his back. Akaashi wanted to ask but he can't. Not when he's in this state. Maybe someday.


	6. Tired of What

Later that day, Tsukishima got home late. Its feel good when Akaashi and Bokuto accompanied him when he's in that state. Even though they didn't know what happened. They didn't ask. They didn't talked about it and its made him really happy that they understand him.

Once he got home, he was shocked when he saw his husband was waiting for him in the living room. Waiting for him to come home. He felt a little happy but the feeling faded when he saw his husband face. Full of anger.

"I'm home," he greeted weakly. He tried to ignore his husband to avoid fight or anything bad to happen. He walked straight to his room but Kuroo stop him with a question.

"where do you go?" he asked with a serious tone. 'ahh..something will happen huh,' he turned to Kuroo. " Akaashi and Bokuto asked me to have a dinner at their house. And they asked to do something that's why I came late. It's not that you'll care so just back off, " he answered with his usual straight tone and started to continues to his room.

"you go to their house or....your sugar daddy's house. You think I didn't know you have someone outside beside me? That day when you asked some useless question..you end up meeting someone right?" with the state that Kuroo said he stopped on his track. Shocked. He turned to Kuroo with a confused face.  
" why should I have a sugar daddy when I'm married. What the fuck do you think I am. Do you think my pride was that low?" he said denying Kuroo's state.

Kuroo laugh..  
"THEN WHO THE MAN YOU MEET WEEK AGO!! DO YOU THINK I DIDN'T KNOW YOU MET HIM THAT DAY?? YOU CONFESSED TO HIM ABOUT OUR MARRIAGE LIFE HUH?? PLEASE...JUST FUCKING STOP," Kuroo shouted made Tsukishima flinched. He didn't know who he talked about. 'man?? Two days ago..did he mean...'

" do you mean Yuuji? What's about him. And yes I've met him but I never told anything to him. What the fuck," week ago, Terushima Yuuji come back from overseas and wanted to meet him so he agreed. They're friends. Terushima always come to his house when they're still kids. They're like brothers but after high-school, he moved to America with his family. They still contact each other.

"IF YOU DON'T TELL HIM ANYTHING THEN WHY THE FUCK HE TEXT ME AND WARNED ME?? HOW THE FUCK DID HE GET MY NUMBER??...and...IF YOU WANT TO GO TO HIM THEN GO..IM FUCKING TIRED WITH YOU," Tsukishima heart broke into pieces. Tired. Did he really tired of him. Tsukishima blood boiled anger. He's the one who tired? 

" tired of what...tired of being my husband? YOU SAY YOU TIRED OF ME AND NOW...I TELL YOU..IM The ONE WHO TIRED OF YOU. I'M TIRED OF WAITING FOR YOU. I'VE BEEN PATIENCE WITH YOU FOR MONTHS. I'M TIRED TO PRETEND THAT I'M OKAY. I'M TIRED OF EVERYTHING AND NOW YOU SAY...you're the one who tired of me?? Tell me..TIRED OF WHAT," he let out everythings. Its hurt him. He didn't want to say it but he can't stop it. Because he's tired.

Kuroo balled his fist shocked. After years, he never heard Tsukishima shouted like this. Angry.. He's always calm. Even if they fight before, he never shouted like this. This shouted was full of pain. But his ego keep leading him. " I'm tired of your behaviour who keep thing secret and I'm the one who be blame," he say. 

Tsukishima laugh bitterly.   
"I what?? Keep things away from you?? Well...since Kozume death..have you ever talked to me? Have you ever tried to approach me? You keep avoiding me so how can I talk to you. I know that the love of your life Kozume dead so that's why you do this to me. I'm not the one. I'm just a toy for you but you need to know. I'm a human and I have a feeling. So...why?? Why do you make me like this, " tears flowing on his cheeks. With his glassy eyes, he noticed Kuroo's angry eyes when he heard Kenma's name.

" what the fuck did you bring up Kenma? He's nothing to do with this situation. It's you fault for being an asshole all this time. You know what...now I answer you question that day...i don't love you because I hate you. I hate the fact that I'm married with you. Why do I even proposed you that time. Now I realise my big mistake for marrying you,"

_#©¥~$>¥¡#=£%£@

" ahhh...you hate me huh?? I've never expected that you'll hate me while i-- nevermind. And...I'm your mistake huh? Just...im sorry, I'm sorry for ruined your life...i shouldn't exist in your life..once again I'm sorry," Tsukishima's heart shattered. Hearimg that he's a mistake really kill him especially when Kuroo was the one who say it. The person he loves the most. He know Kuroo didn't love him but never expected that he hate him either. 

"oh great you notice that... So you know what will happen after this..you know what you should do," Kuroo smirked victory. He win this fight. 

Tsukishima just smiled...he didn't say anything. He just turned around continue walking to his room and when he arrives in front of his room's door he stopped. 

" don't worry...I'll go. Just..not now. You'll live happy after that...with your friends. You'll happy without me. I know from the start. The time will come where you scream and laugh for your victory. No tears. Just wait. Now I need rest. This fight really epic huh.. but still I lose it, " he slammed the door and straight to his bed. Crying...'there's no used for me to live, I'm sorry Yuuji but I can't,'..... 

Flashback where he met Terushima

He's waiting for Terushima in a restaurant while playing his phone. After a few minutes the door opened and revealed a man bit an undercut blond hair. 

" Kei!!!" the man shouted once he stepped in. He look up from his phone and gave him a smile. "ahh...Yuuji. It's been a long time. Have a sit. I already order food for you," Terushima sat cross him with a wide smile. Whe he wanted to start a conversation a beautiful female come to serve their order. The waiter smile shyly at them and turned into a blushed when Terushima winked at her. Tsukishima just giggled seeing his friend didn't changed a bit. 

" so...how was America?? Is it good?" he asked once the waiter leave their table. "yeahh...America is awesome. I mede many friends there but you're my favourite friend" the man say excitedly made Tsukishima giggled. "I've came here last year but I haven't see you. I've come yo your house but your mom say that you're busy with you boyfriend~" he teased. Tsukishima just look at him with a liitle shocked face. 

"you come?? Why don't you contact me. You can ask my mother for my number?" Tsukishima pouted made the man in front of him laugh. "no. No..i don't want to bother your moment with your boyfriend.." Terushima teased more earned 'hmph' from Tsukishima. "and...im sorry because I can't go to your wedding. You know I'm busy with my worked that time..but now I can stay with you because I've been transferred here," he don't understand how the man can be so exited and talking loudly in the restaurant earnd glare from others peoples in the place. When he heard 'wedding' he mood fall. He really hope that they didn't talked about it. But he didn't want to show his friend that he's not happy so he smile. 

"nah..dont worry about that. Well you need to marry to. Found someone and marry them. I want to see you marry someone..ahh it must be beautiful but I feel pity to people who have you as their husband," he laughed while Terushima just pouted..Terushima's pouted face really cute so he pinched his cheeks and laugh again. Terushima smile widely at Tsukishima before he say...

" I found someone. Err...When I come back to Japan last year. I found this man, he's beautiful and looks smart but the problem is...i don't know him. Even his name," he say shyly made Tsukishima to laugh harder. 

"oho...did my little cute friend here fall in love in a first sight? Tell me how he looks like maybe I know him. Since he's from Miyagi right?" Terushima flinched when he say 'cute little'. "I'm not cute and I'm older than you. Don't call me cute, and yes he's from Miyagi" he say.."well I'll tell you after this. We can have a little walk right? Maybe I'll meet him while we walk..hehe" he said and finished his food. Same as Tsukishima. 

Once they finished, they leave the place and walked near the park. 

"how your life with your husband? Did he treated you okay?" Terushima asked him made him choked. Never expected his friend will ask him that question. "we're happy. Reeeeeally happy that made me hard to fall out of love," he smile remembered everything. He's not happy. He's hurt. Every memories that they spend for five years just a waste but for him...it's really sweet. He bitter life become sweet once Kuroo come in his life. 

Suddenly he felt something in his throat made him cough..he cough hardly made him fall to the ground. Terushima who panic suddenly shocked when he saw something came out from his mouth. His eyes widened. 'ugh not now...not in front of him. After what I say' Terushima patted his back to calm him. Tears come out from his face. It's hurt him to see his friend coughing like this....suffered because of love. 

"wh..why..didn't you already married? Then how?" he cried hugging his friend. Its good that the street was empty. He opened his mouth to say something "I ask you again...do you happy with him?" Tsukishima didn't answer him. Just tears come from his eyes. 

"I'll kill him. Who did he think he is to make you suffer like this!" - Terushima

"no...don't. Its not his fault. It's my fault that I love him so much. Please don't tell him. Don't do anything," Tsukishima begged him. 

His blood boiled. "what do you mean it's your fault. You didn't do anything. All you do is loving your husband. Your own husband. It's not your fault..its his fault," Tsukishima shooed his head. Denying. 

"if you didn't want then do the surgery. It's the only way. I can't see you suffer like this. I want you to live. Please...Kei..we do it okay," his eyes softened but Tsukishima just shook his head. "how can I live with my husband if I didn't love him. No I can't do that. I want to love him until my last breathe," he smiled...Terushima tried everything to convince him to do the surgery but its no use. He cares Tsukishima's cheeks wiped his tears.   
"then I'll make him fall in love with you,".... 

'I'm sorry Yuuji but he'll never love me back. I'll die soon'


	7. Date!!

Days past after their argument. They didn't talked to each. Tsukishima didn't call Kuroo for breakfast. He just cooked and leave it there and sometimes he didn't cook because he know Kuroo will never eat it. What Kuroo said before still effect him but he didn't want to be weak. He's strong.

Today, both of them didn't go to work. He's on the living room playing his phone while Kuroo in the kitchen having his breakfast. No one talked. Like they're in a different house. The silent broke when they heard someone knock the door. He look up from his phone and start moving to the door. Once he opened...

"Tsukki!!!!" he hug Tsukishima tightly.  
"Koutaro you're to loud. You'll disturd the neighbours," yeah...Bokuto and his love of his life Akaashi was there in front of the door. Bokuto release the hug and pat Tsukishima.  
"what are you doing here? I taught you two are planning to go for a date today," he asked the two of them but they didn't answer him. Bokuto just come in without being invite and rush looking for Kuroo. Akaashi and Tsukishima just watched him being crazy looking for food in the kitchen.  
" by the way..of course. We will go on a date but...let come in first," Akaashi just smile. Tsukishima confused but let him in and he followed behind. Akaashi bring him to the kitchen to meer Bokuto and Kuroo.

"sooooo..mind tell me what's going on? I know there's reason you come here today," Tsukishima talk first.  
"well...you know. We are going on a date..So.." Bokuto.  
"just say it. I'm waiting," Tsukishima cut him.  
"actually we think you two might want to join us. Like double date??" Bokuto answer with full of hope in his tone. Tsukishima looked at him blankly. Didn't believe what he say.  
"what made you think we will join you. I don't want to bother your sweet moment together. So no," Tsukishima. Kuroo just keep himself silent. Didn't say anything. He didn't know what to say.  
"oh come onnn...its not like you two have anything to do, right? Please."  
"no. Really no. I need to meet someone today," he lie. Its not like he didn't want to but he knows that Kuroo didn't want to. But at this time, he can feel Kuroo was glaring at him.   
"who?" Akaashi asked for more details. He gulped. Who would he meet. No one. He trying to get an answer. "well actually, ur..its someone. From ur..my high-school. Yeah. We have a reunion," more lie. 

"God, Tsukishima I can't believe you. Since when did you ever joined any reunion?" Akaashi said in flat tone.   
"Tsukki come onnn..." Bokuto whined. He just sighed...  
"ask him, I need to meet someone I told you, " he said, finger towards Kuroo. 

"I um..." Kuroo thinking. He didn't want to go anywhere especially a date. After their argument how can he bear staying with his husband like nothing happened. But. Hearing his husband wanted to meet someone made his chest burn. He didn't know but he didn't like it. "I'm in. It's not like I have anything to do today," he say. He can Tsukishima give a murderous glare at him. 'do you think I will let you meet anyone. Dream on' he didn't look at Tsukishima glare. 

"see Tsukki! My bro agree. So go...change your clothes," Bokuto push Kuroo to their bedroom( Tsukishima's bedroom) while Akaashi push him. "wait. Wait bro..I-my room," Kuroo trying to go to escape to his bedroom. "what? What do you mean your room. Didn't you sleep in same room?" Kuroo clenched teeth. "is there something happened? Between you two?," Akaashi asked coriously. "nothing happened. I just sleep early last night and locked the door so he sleep in the guest room," Tsukishima answer him. 'what the fuck. Why should I locked the door...oh my god what types of answer is that' Tsukishima taught. Well...the two owls didn't ask anything after that but keep pushing them to their bedroom. Once they in, they leave the married couple alone and close the door. 

Tsukishima opened the closet and take out some clothes. While Kuroo just stand there. "you didn't have to go if you didn't want to,you know," Tsukishima break the silence between them. "I don't wnnat tobit what if the smell something suspicious between us. Plus we didn't to do anything isn't it," Kuroo answer calmly. Tsukishima look at him and turn away. "do whatever you want. By the way your clothes is still there. Just take it," Tsukishima walked to the bathroom to change his clothes. Kuroo just look at him walking and started looking for his clothes. When he was busy looking Tsukishima's phone ringing. Someone calling. Kuroo looked at the phone and his chest burn when he saw the person who call his husband. 'yuuji'. He didn't know why but he didn't like the person name Yuuji. He haven't meet him yet but he hate it. He wanted to answer the call and tell him to stop calling his husband but he stopped when he realised what's he's doing. 'what. Why did I feel like this. Why should I mad if he's go into someone else. It's not like I love him. tch,' he continued prepare his clothes and Tsukishima came out from the restroom. 

Tsukishima grab his phone while it's Kuroo turn to changed his clothes. From the bathroom he can hear his husband talking with someone in his phone. "it's his fucking Yuuji, ugh" he murmured and continue changing his clothes. When he was changing he suddenly heard his husband burst into laugh, like there's no one will heard him. After a few minutes his husband stop talking and he heard the door open means he's already outside. He fix his clothes and step out from the bathroom. He walked towards the mirror and fix his hair trying to put different style but there's no use. It's still the same. "I hate my hair". After that he walked out from the room toward his husband and his friend that waiting for him. 

"HEY! BRO! LET'S GOOO" Bokuto seems excited and he just dragged him outside followed by Tsukishima and Akaashi behind. They ride different cars so it's easy if they go home later. Tsukishima with him meanwhile Akaashi and Bokuto together. They started to drove to Amusement Park. 

Even though he's in the same car as his husband, they didn't talk much. Actually they didn't talked at all. On their way to their destination, the car was silent. Its only the radio that make sound. Its an awkward moment and Kuroo feel weird with it. He didn't remembers when the last time they go on a date. It's been a long time ago. Tsukishima Kei who would never started a conversation unless it's important always show everything about him to Kuroo. Things that not everyone can see. Only Kuroo can feel affection from Tsukishima Kei. But it's all long time ago. Now, it's gone. Tsukishima Kei that always smile at him, laugh with him didn't exist anymore. He never laughed with Kuroo anymore. "shit. Why am I thinking about him" he cursed himself. He looked at his husband. Tsukishima didn't looked at him even the road. He's playing his phone. Scrolling YouTube. Kuroo stared at him until Tsukishima turned to him. 

"you're driving. I know you want me to die but in this situation there's chance you'll die too. And I still something to do before I die. So please drive properly," Tsukishima stated looking at him coldly. He feel his face started to heat up so he turned his face try to focus on driving. He didn't miss the way Tsukishima said 'I know you want me to die'. To be honest, he didn't know either. If the person beside him, the person who he married really mean it. 'will I cry' he asked himself. But before he think about it more deeply they arrived at Amusement Park. 

When they step out from the car, they saw the two owl couple waiting for them near the gate. They rush toward them and greeted with a pair of widest smile from his friends. "well let's go. We need to enjoy this moment. It's rare for us to spend time together like this you know," Kuroo said earning a sharp glare from Tsukishima as he started to walk in but stopped when Bokuto stated a impossible idea for him and Tsukishima with their problem. 

" wait~we are on a date right? " Bokuto say earning a nod from the other. " soooo, we need to hold hand. I mean I hold my boyfriend's hand and you hold your husband's hand. Didn't it will be more romantic?? Holding hand along your date," at that time Kuroo realise something. So is Tsukishima. 'they planned all this. Damn it,' they both tought. Kuroo look at his husband, nervous. Its been a long time since the last time he touch his husband. Without saying anything he just hold Tsukishima's hand and he can feel Tsukishima hand was cold. Really cold. 

Tsukishima body tense up with the sudden touch from his husband that hate him. He didn't expect Kuroo to hold his hand especially with their problem right now. Well, it's not like he hate it. 'I miss him. I miss the moment when he always trying to have a body contact with each other. I hope it will never end,' he tought. 

Kuroo can feel Tsukishima hands relax with him holding his. He almost forgot how big his hand in Tsukishima's hand. His hand was warm meanwhile Tsukishima's hand was cold as ice. He tried to find something to make him stop thinking about his husband so he stated...

"come on..." he dragged Tsukishima in. When he eyes meet the two couple in front him he swore that there's a wide grin in their face. 

The couple follow after them...Bokuto is the one who excited the most. Once he entered...  
"HEY! HEY! HEYYY!!!" he shouted. Akaashi in other hand just shook his head embarrassed. "what the fuck Koutarou, shut the fuck up. You're embarrassing," meanwhile Tsukishima just look at the couple with a grin.."i can't believe my friend was a kid," he say. And he let out a small laugh when Bokuto whined at Akaashi who scold him. 

***

The date was really fun. Its just a simple date like they do before. But for Kuroo, 'something feel off. I wonder what' he tought. Along the dated their hand didn't leave each other but they rarely talked. They only communicate when there's simple question like 'do you want that' or ' hurry up they gonna leave us' answered by only a nod or yes or not. 

When they found a dinasour doll at the store,... 

"Tsukki!! Look its a dinasour. Didn't you want to be a dinasour??" Bokuto said teasing. Tsukishima look at him. His face red from embarrassment. "oh shut up. Who said I want to be a dinasour. I didn't want to be dinasour," he huffed. Bokuto look at him unimpressed. "oho. Why is that. You love dinasour," he said. Tsukishima sighed. "of courses I love dinasour. But you know, even if dinasour already died, people still remember them. Still proud of them. Everyone know them. If it was me, I mean..if I die one day, I don't want everyone to remember me. I don't want people to cry for my death. Its painful you know. Seeing people cry because of you. I'd rather be forgotten. I- want peace when I die. No tears," he said smiling at them. The three of them speechless. Bokuto face become sad. Tsukishima just laugh. His hand pointed at them. 

" so. Promise me something. If I die, don't cry. I don't want to see tears. You're ugly when you cry. If you want to give me flower, don't!! I hate flower. Its not like I can eat it. Just uhmm...give strawberry, or my favourite shortcake," he said proudly. The look on his face seems confident. Like he's ready for it. " why do you say that. You'll never die. We will be here with you Kay, " Bokuto said sadly. " Kei, did you hide something from us? Why saying stuff like this, " hearing Akaashi called his given name made him tense. He always know that Akaashi only use his name when he's serious. Or about to scold him. But he just smile at them. "pfft..nothing. Listen Mr. Handsome guy Bokuto Koutarou and Mr. Angel Akaashi Keiji soon to be Bokuto Keiji. I'm just hungry. Can I eat my strawberry shortcake now? AND!! Even if die, I'll still wake up as Tsukishima Kei but different world. There's reborn and that time I'll make sure I want to be a dinasour. The strongest one. So come onnn, " Tsukishima holding Akaashi hand showing his puppy eyes. Kuroo look at him. His face saddened. He still didn't know what Tsukishima trying to say but he know, it's related to their problem. 

Akaashi look at Tsukishima's puppy eyes asking for shortcake. " Tsukishima, I. As a doctor I said you can't eat sweet food. No matter how sweet your tooth is, you still can't. You need to stay healthy," didn't want to lose on Tsukishima's puppy eyes. Tsukishima huffed like a children. "I'm a doctor too," Akaashi just chuckled at his friend behaviour. "a doctor that always remind his patients to stay healthy but didn't do it to himself?" with that Tsukishima let go Akaashi hand and pouted. He murmured something that no one heard him. "did you something?" Akaashi asked. He just 'hmph' Tsukishima and turned to Bokuto. "Mr. Handsome - kun....the most amazing friend I've ever had. The most cheerful one. That I reallllly love. Can I have a strawberry shortcake? Just one, " with his puppy eyes..of course, and with Tsukishima praised him. Its rare for Tsukishima to praised people so of course he will say yes. How can he say no. Bokuto patted his head with a wide smile." of course Tsukki! You need to eat more. Sugar is really good. For energy Tsukki. Right?" without saying anything Tsukishima hugged Bokuto tightly cheering. "thank you Mr. Handsome. You're my favourite. Mr. Angel in second place right now," he joked. On the other side Akaashi just rolled his eyes in defeat. True enough. If Tsukishima become somewhat clingy, no one can say no. It's a rare sight. Kuroo who just enjoyed the scene kinda feel disappointed. 'he always asking me for strawberry shortcake before. Now, he didn't even talk to me. I wonder if he's like this with that Yuuji guy,' 

With that, they go to the cafe nearby to buy Tsukishima's strawberry shortcake. They order their drink with two slice shortcakes. Yeah Tsukishima said one but when they arrived he used his puppy eyes to Bokuto for another slice and Bokuto proudly let him and paid for him. When Bokuto busy patting Tsukishima head while eating he can hear Akaashi murmured.."such a baby." and he smile at that. Tsukishima not being himself today. He mean, he was like this before. But not now. Not for him. Akaashi turned his gaze to Kuroo. "did something happened with you two?" he asked. He gulped his saliva in his mouth. He can't tell them about their problem. He can't. Before he could deny it, Akaashi start talking again. "I mean, he's being clingy lately. When we were at work, he'll come to me when he's off.you know what he do. He just sat beside me and play with my stuff. Or asking for hug even though all this time he really hate psychical contact," Akaashi sip his drink." is it a bad thing? Maybe he miss you," 'maybe he's searching for a warmth. I've never gave it to him anymore. We're falling apart. Its my fault' his answer and his tought different. Completely different. Akaashi just hummed in responses before he stated "maybe,i like him like this. But one thing. He's married but act like a baby right now," he shooked his head.

When they finish eating the step out from the cafe. Kuroo's hand holding Tsukishima's. They already spent hours in the Amusement Park so now it's time go back to their apartment. As they was a about to bid their goodbye... 

"hey guys!! It's a good date today..and it's still early soooo..since my lovely keiji here like ice skating, why don't we go there. And here my little Tsukki is a pro. Can we??" Bokuto suggest. Tsukishima just looked at him unimpressed.."well, yuuji always bring me before so yeah I can skate but wait...how do you know I can skate??" Tsukishima looks confused. Bokuto rubbed his neck shyly...before he changed the topic. "nah...now let's gooo!!" he said.


	8. Date!! - Yuuji & Kei

"Kei, we are going to meet mom's friend. She's a great person and he have a son. You can be friend with him. Okay. Come on," older Tsukishima persuade the tiny five years old Tsukishima to join her to meet her old friend. The tiny Tsukishima only look at her with a teary eyes. His hand hugging his Dino plushies. 

" he's not going to make fun of Kei?" that's what he said in low voice. The older one smile at him, shooked her head. "no Kei, he's a good boy. Like you. He like having a friend," there's smile showed in his face but its turned in a pout. "but mom, why did he wanted to be Kei's friend. Kei's classmates said Kei will never have a friend because Kei is weird. Kei..cant make a friend," his teary eyes let out tears. His mother without any word just hug him. It's true that he has no friend. He didn't like talking to others. It's not like he didn't want to but he didn't know how. He's not an active kid. He didn't like running like the others kid. He like reading. His classmates make fun of him because his face looks like a girl. Everyone said he's beautiful that's why no one wanted to be his friend. But he's okay with that. 'I'm used to it' that's what he tought from the beginning. 

"aww Kei. Don't worry about that okay? I'm here. His mother said he want to meet you. He's not like other kid. He's a good boy. We'll meet him okay," he nodded. Hearing that made him relief. His mother smile..."aww, come on. Their house just blocks away from us. So you can meet him anytime," he didn't talked anything after that. His mother carried him. The Dino plushies never let go from his hug. 

Once the get to his mother's friend's house. He saw a black hair women greeted them. 

" oh Tsukishima-San. You're here. Come in," the beautiful lady step aside to let them in. They walked towards the living room. The little Tsukishima shyly hide behind the older legs. The lady chuckle seeing the Little Tsukishima hugging his plushies. 

" ah, sorry Terushima-san. Kei is akways like this. He's a shy boy. Kei, say hi to aunty," Kei tilted his head taking a good look at Terushima-san and bid his hi. "Hi aunty. Nice to meet you," he said shyly. His hug his plushies tighter. Scared. Terushima patted his head trying to have a conversation with him before there's a footstep sound from the stair. Terushima turned his head and form a smile on her face. 

"ah its Yuuji. Yuuji!! Come here. I want you to meet mom's friend," and a boy came with a confused face. "who?" he said. Kei stared at him. Just in one look, he can tell that the boy was loud. 

The boy 'Yuuji' walked towards them and stop beside his mother. "Yuuji this is mom's friend, Tsukishima-san. Go say hi to aunty," at first the boy was confused but he walked anyway to hug the older Tsukishima with a bright smile on his face. "hi aunty. I'm Yuuji. Nice to meet you," when they released the hug, the older Tsukishima looked at the boy with awe and patted his head saying that he's a good boy. "Yuuji-kun, it was nice to meet you too. Aww what a good boy. Ah this is my son, Kei come here," Kei didn't move, he stared at Yuuji. He move when his mother called hin the second time. When he stop in front Yuuji he hides his face on his plushies. Scared if being called a girl. He hates kids who called him girl. 'I'm a boy' that's what he said everytime they called him that. 

"hey. Err...Kei. I'm Yuuji," Yuuji pull out his hand. Kei moved his face from the plushies staring at the hand. He took Yuuji's hand. "H..hi..Yuuji," Yuuji's face lit up. Excited. 

"well Yuuji, you can bring Kei to your room. Play with him. Be a good boy okay," the older Terushima patted their head. Yuuji nodded and grab Kei's wrist dragging him to his room. 

When they arrived in Yuuji's room, Kei looked around. The room is neither big nor small. There are many toys lying on the floor. But, what caught his attention was the number of books on the shelf next to Yuuji's study desk. Not only books but also a small dinosaur statue. He smiled But the smile disappeared because he did not want Yuuji saw how excited he is. So he just looked to his foot with Dino plushies that were hugged tightly. What he did not know was that Yuuji watched him from the beginning.

When Yuuji saw the smile in Kei's face he chuckle. 'cute' he tought. "hey Kei come on. You can play that you know," he pointed at the Dino statue. Kei look up at him and his face turned red because of embarrassment. Yuuji laugh. "why are you red?" he asked.   
"all my classmate said dinosaur is boring. They always laugh at me," he murmured. Instead of laughing, Yuuji patted his head. "you can love wathever you like. Don't mind them. I love them too. But I'm not obsessed," Kei's face lit up and a bright smile form on his face. Yuuji can't control himself from the cuteness and hugged him. "ahhh...why are you so cute. Unfair," he whined, still hugging Kei. 

They was playing whatever game that Yuuji said. Honestly, Kei was having fun. He don't feel lonely. He smile alone, 'I have a friend' he tought. 

"hey. Is there something wrong?? Why are you stop playing?" Yuuji's voice brought him to reality. He turned to face him and shooked his head. "nothing. Just thinking about something," but Yuuji fekt curious about it. "wanna share?" he asked. Kei was thinking for a while and smile. "can I ask you something?" "yeah sure," he take a deep breath.   
"why are you playing with me? I mean..Don't you think I'm weird. My face?" he askes. Yuuji frowned. "why shouldn't I play with you. You're not weird Kei. And your face? What's with your face?" Kei look down. "they said my face look like a girl so no one wanted to be my friend. They said I always quiet and love reading. I have no friend," he said quietly. 

Hearing that made Yuuji's eyes widened. 'how can they said something like that to Kei!! He's..he's pretty,' he moved towards Kei and hugged him." I like seeing your face. It's beautiful. You're beautiful Kei. You know that. You're special. You like reading and you're smart. They need to be ashamed of themselves. And. Don't worry if they said like that again, just tell me okay. I'll beat their ass," he patted Kei's head and it made Kei feel loved. No one ever do that to him before besides his family. Everyone always make fun of him. But now,, there's someone who cares about him. He felt loved. 

Yuuji loves to hug Kei. It feel really good. Warm. And the strawberry scent when he kissed Kei's hair. It's so sweet. He love the scent. He keep patting his hair until heard snore. He look down at kei and he saw Kei was asleep. His peaceful face. It's really cute. He can't help but stared at the face. 

"I will always protect you. I will kill anyone who try to hurt you. I promise." 

***

Kei was ten years old when he start to learn ice skating. 

"aunty?? Where's Yuuji? He didn't come to Kei's home today," he was talking on his phone with Yuuji's mother. Despite answering, Yuuji's mother only chuckle. "he's on his way darling. He said he has something for you," suddenly Kei's felt really excited about what Yuuji have for him. When he wanted to response their door bell was ringing. He smile. "aunty, I guess Yuuji is here. Bye aunty. Kei will come visit later," he bid his goodbye before he hang up amd run towards the door. 

He opened the door and there's eleven years Yuuji smiling brightly. 

"Yuuji ni-chan!!" he hugged Yuuji. "i miss you. You're late today," he said releasing the hug. "I'm sorry Kei-chan. I miss you too. I have practice you know. That's why I'm late. By the way here. My mom bake it amd i hel her," Yuuji gave him a box. When Kei take it. The smell from the box really made him excited. Syrawberry shortcake. they moved to the living room. Kei was holding Yuuji's hand. He always hold Yuuji's hand when they walked together. He felt safe with Yuiji. 

"practice? Practice what. Do you join any sport club?" he asked curiously. "oh!!yeah..i havent told you before but i join the ice skating club," Kei still holding Yuuji's hand, tilted his head. "how do you play ice skating? Is it fun??" Yuuji smile like he's so ready to answer the question. "yeah! its like you're dancing on the ice. Its really fun Kei-chan. You can dance with a song played. Sometimes i do it to release all my worry, if i scared or whatever. It felt good. Do you wanna try?" Kei's eyes lit up. He nodded excitedly. "sure!! As long as Kei is with Yuuji nii-chan, i will!! It will be fun" yeah. As long as hes with Yuuji that will accompany him he's okay. "yeah Kei-chan. We will always together like that. And oh!! You can be my partner. But You're not a girl," Yuuji's voice sounds down at the last sentence. 

"don't worry Yuuji nii-chan. Kei's face looks like a girl so i still can be your partner," he said proudly made the older laugh. "yeah..you'll always be by my side," always. With that I'll always protect you.

***

"Kei-chan please? Just this time okay??" fourteen years old Yuuji was begging a thirteen years old Kei to be his partner for his ice skating tournament. "but Kei is not a girl. And if Kei want to, they'll never let me," he said. His voice was low. Yes he want to but their coach said they cant because he's not a girl. He's a boy. "but Kei you can pretend to be girl right. Your face is pretty. you're the prettiest and they'll never know that you're a boy. Okay Kei??" Yuuji begged. Hes not the type to beg or forcing someone but he's already used to dance with Kei. Player that know them, keep saying they're the best duo. Even their coach tell them the same thing. But they cant be a partner. 

" b-but..I-"   
" Kei, for me?? Can you do this for me? You said you love me. You didn't want to see me sad right,?so,,can you?please.." i love you too. I really do. But i know you just mean it as a brother. 

Kei look at him. His eyes started to gain water. Until he nodded. Kei agree to be his partner. And what was the best thing other Kei for him? Nothing. Because he loves Kei. More than a brother. Who wouldn't fall in love with Kei. His face. His voice. And the way he dance on the ice. His elegant body. His movement. Its beautiful. For him..everything about Kei are beautiful. He's an angel. But he can't have it. Because Kei is too precious. Too good for him. He know it from the very start. That's why..at least he want to be with him. Wanted to be his guardian. His protector. 

***

The tournament was held pretty good. Kei was wearing a fake long blonde hair. Same with his original hair and he didn't wear his glasses. Instead, he was wearing contact. At that time, Kei really look like an angel. A beautiful angel. The most beautiful. 

"hey,, Princess Keiko-chan...ready to dance??" he bowed while pull out his hand waiting for Kei to take it. Kei rolled his eyes. "stop calling Kei with that name. Keiko, Keiko..didnt my name sounds like a girl's name already and I'm not a princess," he took Yuujis hand and they moves to the corner. "well,,you look really pretty today. So im gonna call you Keiko. It's a cute name Keiko-kunn," Yuuji response him playfully. Kei snorted. "well. Just for today, Yuuji ni-chan," he smile widely. For Yuuji its like there's a bright light in Kei's face and it can make him blind. 'kei..heh. Suit his person. He's bright. Hes the moon. My princess. Firefly' 

The music 'My Heart Will Go On' started and just like that they start dancing elegantly made the audience stunned. What a beautiful sight they gave the audience. They dance will all they got until the music stop. They panted tiredly. Bowing to each other. 

In Yuuji's minf its like he's dancing with the Beauty and he's the Beast. 'hahh what is this. Is this a dream. Am i really dancing like that in the movie. Where i dance with the person i love. The beauty one? What it is?? Ah..it's us. Beauty and The Beast' he tought. 

***  
Kei was really nervous waiting for the winner's announcement. Their performance was really good. Everyone would fell in love just by seeing their performance but still he didn't think they can win. Its because..what if they find out that he's a boy. Not a girl. They'll be disqualified isn't it? 

But to his surprise..they didn't get caught. Well that's made him relief and the most unexpected things that happen(for him) is that they won. They really won. He can't stopped his eyes from releasing tears. Its a tears of happines. 

"Yuuji ni-chan..we..win. We win!!" he hugged Yuuji tightly. "we win Kei. Ah sorry,,,Keiko-chan. We win," he either cant stop crying but still manage to make some lame jokes. It's his first time too actually. 

They took pictures together. Some of the picture was when he still wear girl outfit and some of them with his casual clothes. 

"hah. Let's do it again one day Keiko-kun"

But..

That was the last time they joined a tournament as a partner.(actually the got scolded by their coach hahha) and after they started high school, they didnt have time to practice together. Kei stop from playing ice skating because he need to score his grade but Yuuji didnt. So everytime he have free time, he will join him. Like the old days. 

Until one day when Yuuji graduated, their family moved to America. He will attend college there. He will leaves Kei. Alone again. Without friends. And the last thing he said to Kei was... 

'when I come back one day. We'll play together okay. Bye Kei-chan. I'm gonna miss you. I love you' 

*-------*

As Kei steps into the ice skating rink he feels like memories are coming back. How he missed all those memories. Dancing with Yuuji. He hopes he can replay those memories. Everything. So that all this does not happen. 'He would be happy if I could turn it all back. Everyone will be happy.' 

"Hey Kei. Because we are not good at ice skating, we asked someone to teach us," Akaashi said while preparing his boyfriend. Kiroo was busy with his phone. 

"eh. I can teach you. It's not difficult at all," he replied. Well he is used to teaching people. "But it doesn't matter. Who is your teacher," he asked Akaashi.

"him" Akaashi pointed in the middle and there was a young man with blonde hair. Undercut. Smiling at them. Hans waving at them. He process what he saw until he realised it. His eyes widened.

"KEIKO-CHANNN!!! I'M HERE!!!"


	9. Date!! Pt. 2

"KEIKO-CHANN!!! I'M HERE!!"

___

"it's that really him Akaashi? I'm not dreaming right?" he eyes didn't move from the man. Akaashi smile even though he knows Tsukishima didn't look at him.  
"it's really him. Terushima Yuuji," Akaashi answered him gently. He didn't wait for the others he just moved towards Terushima. A bright smile on his face.

"Yuuji!!" he jumped and Terushima catched him into hug. "hey,, I was about to ask you about this later but you're here," he tightened his hug. "didn't I said I'll always be by your side," Terushima chuckle. The hug felt like home. It feel like he's still a kid. A lonely kid. They released the hugged and Terushima kisses his cheek. He didn't mad. He's laughing instead. "still strawberry huh Keiko-chan," ahh..Terushima always tease him about loving strawberry. Tsukishima make a pouty face rubbing his hair. "you didn't complain it that time we meet," Before Terushima could respond to Tsukishima's words, suddenly a song began to be heard. A song they are very familiar with.

The song 'My Heart Will Go on' took them to their very beautiful childhood. They turned towards Akaashi and the others. Akaashi was smiling at them. Same as Bokuto. 

Terushima began to make space between them. He bowed with his hand extended to Tsukishima to greet.

"Princess Keiko-chan. Ready to dance?" At that moment, Tsukishima felt like he wanted to shed tears but he held on. He greeted his booty hand with a bright smile.

"sure ... my Prince,"

***

Kuroo look up from his phone when he heard someone yelling out a name he never heard. Looking if there're peoples other than them but there, in the corner, a man he's not really familiar with. But still,, he know the man. He have stalked that man before. The man that gave him a death threat about his husband and it made his blood boiled. Then he turned his face to his husband. 

Tsukishima was smiling brightly. Eyes on the man. Terushima Yuuji. The looks that Tsukishima gave Terushima was excitement and for some reason his heart hurt so much. He didn't know why but its really hurt. 

The next thing he knew was Tsukishima fastly moved towards the man. He stared at Tsukishima who jumped on Terushima's hug. He clenched his fist and what made him more angry is that that Terushima guys kissed his husband cheek but Tsukishima didn't get mad at him. With what he knows, Tsukishima hates physical contact and whoever tries to touch him will get mad. But he's not. Terushima kissed him and he's okay with it. He also laugh. 

"hey, bro," the owl like man called him. With an angry feeling he turned to him. "what,"  
"are you jealous bro," Bokuto tease him. He clicked his tounge. "why should I be jealous with him. He's not worth it," he lied. The truth is that he feel like he want to kill that Terushima.  
"for you maybe he's not. But, Look at them. The way they look at each other. The way Terushima look at Tsukki. Can't you see? He look at Tsukki like he's the most important person in his life. You know, Tsukki is special. You maybe don't know but he is. He's worth it, " Bokuto patted his back. "it's okay to be jealous, bro. You're his husband," with that Bokuto walked towards Akaashi. 

He turned back to his phone to distracted himself from having more weird feeling with what happened there. He scrolled down whatever apps he opened but he can't stop but feel angry seeing his husband happy with another man. He hates this feeling. He didn't understand why he felt angry because he's a hundred percent sure that he hates his husband. 

'you're jealous' 

He heard a voice in his head. His eyes widened. That voice. He know who's voice is it. It's the one and only. He look around looking where the voice came from. There's no one. 'he's died. Kenma already gone. It's just my imagination' he tought. It's almost a year since Kenma's death. And now, he heard the voice. Telling him that he's jealous of his husband. 'what the fuck is that. It's impossible that I jealous. He ruined my life' another thought . He shrugged and turn back to his phone. 

Then heard a song so he looked up. It was Akaashi. He's bringing a speaker and put it aside. Bokuto was there helping him. And then he turned where his husband was. Hands still with each other. He watched them turned their gaze to meet Akaashi's and Bokuto's. He watched them as Terushima made some spaces between him and Tsukishima. He watched them when Terushima bowed with his hand out. He watched them as Tsukishima took Terushima hands with a smile on his face. A gentle smile he never saw lately. And lastly,, he watched the pairs stand dancing following the songs melodies. He watched everything and his heart can't take it. For some reason it's hurt. Really hurt. Seeing his husband smiling but not with him. 

"they look like a Charming Prince with a Beautiful Princess dancing under a beautiful night sky with bright stars on it and don't forgot the moon. It's a beautiful view. Like they own this place. Just them," he heard Bokuto said still staring at the dancing pair. Akaashi nodded in agreement. "yeah. It's beautiful."

His blood start boiling but when look at his husband and Terushima,, he can't deny what Bokuto and Akaashi said,,because it's beautiful.  
'what will I look like if I'm the one who was dancing there with him. Not Terushima. Will the view looks beautiful like this or maybe more,' he tought. He shooked his head trying to push the thought from his head. He convinced himself that he hates Tsukishima. He really is. 

***

Terushima was enjoying himself being near Tsukishima. His first love and the only person he wanted to share his life with but its all just a fantasy for him. He wants Tsukishima to be happy with the person he loves so he tried. He tried to move on and he knows that it's hard. He spent years to forget his feeling towards the other blonde. When he got the news about Tsukishima getting married, oh how hurt he is that time. But then he tried more and more. He tried to date but it didn't end up long. And slowly, the feeling start to fade. But he need to be honest. It's not completely gone. Deep inside he still has the feeling to protect the blonde. To love the blonde. But not as a lover. As a brother instead. 

Beside, he already found someone. But that doesn't mean he didn't care about Tsukishima. He care a lot about him.  
'ahh I hope that someone will love me too' he tought as he chuckle. 

Tsukishima who still enjoying himself saw how Terushima chuckle. He smirked. "ohhhh...thinking about your crush??" he said in teasing tone. He can see how Terushima blushed hardly. His face almost match the tomatoes. This sight made Tsukishima laugh.  
"you should tell me who he is someday," he said as they're continuing their dance. They made some spaces between them as Tsukishima move to make an elegant movement. Terushima looks impressed. 

"still good as before huh?" they dance until the music stopped and another song started. This time, the song was more lively. They chuckle at each other and turned to look at the three man that watching their whole dance. 

Tsukishima was the first one who move towards them and reached Akaashi and Bokuto's hand. "Mr. Handsome and Mr. Angel, would like to dance with this poor soul," he bowed slightly. Bokuto looked at him awe while Akaashi chuckle with the nickname that Tsukishima gave him. 

"of course Tsukki!!" said Bokuto taking Tsukishima hand. "Kou, you can't skate," Akaashi break Bokuto's excitement. Bokuto look at his lover with his sad eyes. "but I want to. Tsukki looks beautiful there with Terushima. I want to looks beautiful too," Tsukishima just watched them trying to hold his laugh. 

"I will hold him. Mr. Handsome will make it because I'll teach him. Mr. Angel can join too. Right Mr. Handsome?" Bokuto nodded "yeah Keiji, Tsukki is here. Can we??" Tsukishima know that Akaashi can't say no to Bokuto. Everyone know. Akaashi shooked his head and sighed in defeated. He knows saying no to Bokuto will not end up well.. "okay. Go ahead. But please be careful,". Bokuto cheered loudly and so is Tsukishima. Akaashi rolled his eyes and join them. 

Meanwhile Kuroo was there watching the trio talking and having fun when he feel someone standing beside him. He turned to the side only saw Terushima smiling while watching the trio. Not the trio. It's Tsukishima Kei. He felt like he wanted to punch the guy eyes for staring at his husband like that. Like it's his. 

After the trio were far from them, Terushima turned to him. The smile earlier was faded and turned into a serious expression. 

"don't hurt him," the older blonde said made he turned his face to him. "huh??" he asked corious.  
"Kei. Please take a good care of him. Don't hurt him. He may not look like it but...he's fighting his pain all this time. Don't make it worse," the older blonde was waiting for any sound from kuroo but the silence keep going so he continue. "Kei is..he's strong but you need to know. Everything will end. Everything has it's limit. I hate saying this but you're so lucky having Kei in you life. For someone like him, trying to get his love is hard. But once he fall in love, it's hard for him to fall out love. We need to struggle to have his trust. If he gave you all his trust, he will always there waiting for you. Believe everything you said to him . But once his trust faded, there's no second chance. Kei hate second chance. Because for him, second chance will only break his heart. But you..." he stopped, taking a deep breath." you lie to him all this time. You play with his feeling. You made him hoping too much. You made him waiting. In the end you lie to him. You break him. You know, Part of him already die. But, he's still waiting for you until now. And i know, its killing him," he sighed as he turned to look at the trio who happily skating around while laughing." years. I love him for years. But he choose you who he only know in a short amount of time. It's hurt seeing him with someone else but I know he's not for me. So I move on and I tought you'll be the one who will always made him happy. 'cause the way he looks at you with love and he looks happy with you. Guess I'm wrong," he chuckle weakly. " fix it before it's getting worse or you'll regret everything. Stop being selfish because the moon's shine is about to fade," he closed his eyes and leave to join the trio. 

Kuroo in the other hand didn't say anything. He watched Terushima leave him behind trying to process what Terushima really mean by the Moon's shine is about to fade. 'is that mean that his love is about to fade? Didn't that's a good thing," he sighed. His head was hurt thinking about it. 

" KUROO!!! COME HERE!! WE NEED TO ENJOY THIS TOGETHER!! " Bokuto yelled from where they were standing. He gave them a small smile and move towards them. 

The rest of the day was really fun even though deep inside his blood keep boiling seeing Tsukishima and Terushima flirting with each other. On the other hand, Bokuto keep falling made them laugh harder. Akaashi looks really panic seeing his lover doing stupid things. 

It was fun until its not. Tsukishima almost faint while he skate. Luckily Terushima was there to catch him from falling. They were panic with the situation. Tsukishima's face was pale and it made him worried. They suggested to bring him to the hospital but Tsukishima said he didn't want to and just like that they make decision its better for them to go home since its getting late. 

***

Along the trip to go home, the atmosphere in their car was silence. Both didn't talk anything. Neither the radio sounded. Tsukishima back was laying on the back seat while looking outside the window. No one dare to talk. 

When they arrive at their apartment area, kuroo parked his car. Before he step out from the car, he realised that Tsukishima didn't make any movement to step out so he look at him. Turned out the blonde was sleeping. Kuroo wanted to wake him up but his face was pale so he decided to just bring him bridal style to their apartment. 

He realised how light Tsukishima is when he bring him. He's lighter than before and more skinny. It's like he's didn't have enough food all this time. How could he know, he never stay with Tsukishima when breakfast, lunch and even dinner. 

He sighed and when he reached their apartment, he opened it and walked straight to Tsukishima's room which suppose to be their room. 

He put Tsukishima on the bed carefully, scared to wake the blonde. He pulled the blanket to cover the blonde body. When he wanted to leave the blonde alone in the room he saw tears on the blonde face and it made his eyes softened. He went to wipes the tears but he stopped when he heard the blonde murmured...

"don't tell anyone but I'm dying," the sentence leave him speechless. He stared at the blonde face and he didn't remember when the last time he stared at the blonde before. 

"you love him" 

Again, kenma's voice playing in his head make it hurt. He gave the blonde last glance before he turned to door. When he was about to close the door he heard the blonde again... 

"I'm sorry"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pls Read this. It's part of the story that I'm not gonna write in there: 
> 
> Errr.. Hello🙂urhmmm i don't really know what to say but... Just wanted you to know that maybe you confused why kuroo heard kenma's voice. 
> 
> Yeah kenma's is dead(in this fic) so the voice in kuroo's head is just his imagination. The voice is part of his memories with the blonde. I mean Tsukishima. When they're still happy together. 
> 
> As you can see, even though kuroo said he hates Tsukishima but part of him still for Tsukishima but the hatred lead his heart and it made him can't accept his feeling towards the blonde. And part of his memories (which is with Tsukishima) trying to remind him how much he loves Tsukishima and want them to get together like their old life. A happy couple. 
> 
> And Tsukishima's condition is getting worse🙂as you know, only a few of them know about his illness. I'm gonna mentioned it later. 
> 
> And yes Terushima already move on and he's into someone else that he found when he's in Miyagi. And the good things is that that someone is actually there all the time. He just need to make a move but he's scared.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading❤️❤️and yeah since I've already post this on Wattpad, I'll post daily here until my previous chapters👁️👄👁️see you tomorrow.


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